Kale and cabbage gratin! Gluten-free!

I hadn't made very much new or interesting food in a while. I've been eating things like baked chicken legs, and roasted sweet potatoes, and rice pudding. All are wonderful, and have become comforts foods in lieu of Honey Nut Cheerios, or Vienna Fingers, or Chips Ahoy, but they've been starting to get a little boring. I came across a recipe in the NYT the other day though, for a kale and cabbage gratin, and was intrigued. Gratins are one of those dishes that I feel are always being bruited about in my Food & Wine, but I've never quite had a handle on what one was, save that it involved cheese. As the culinary fates would have it, I had just picked up a bag of kale at the farmer's market on Saturday (another plug for Atherton Mill and Market!!) and I had half a head of cabbage left over in the fridge.

So, a gratin it was! The NYT recipe calls for breadcrumbs, which I can't eat right now, and for fresh sage, which I don't have. I thought I'd be safe with thyme (really, who's allergic to thyme) but substituted the dry stuff. And since I hadn't re-tested garlic, I took this as an opportunity to do so. Left out the onion, since I didn't have one, and used cheddar cheese, since I DO have that. Without the breadcrumbs, it's gluten-free. Booyah.

Simplified ingredients looked like this (plus olive oil):
Kale, cabbage, cheddar, 2 eggs, a few cloves of garlic, short-grain (I use arborio) rice, salt, pepper and thyme.

Here's how you make it...

Cook 1/2 to 1/3 cup of arborio rice. I dumped some in the pan, so I don't really know how much I used.

While the rice cooks, saute a few cloves of garlic, sliced, in the olive oil. De-stem the kale (you can just rip the fluffy leaves off the stem - it's not a big pain like de-stemming collards). Add a bunch of kale (I used a fluffy colander-full) and thinly sliced cabbage (I used about 1/3 of a small head) to the pan with the garlic. Let it wilt a little, adding a scant 1/2 cup of water once it's gotten brighter in color and slightly wilty. Let it simmer in the water until the water evaporates...the leaves should be bright green, and pliable/droopy but still firm. Add salt, pepper, and thyme to taste.

Grate the cheese!!!

Beat the two eggs in a bowl.

(I made everything in the skillet, but you can mix it in a bowl and then dump it in a casserole if you wanted.)

Turn the heat off the greens once they're done (droopy, still slightly firm and bright green - not soggy). Stir in the cooked rice. Stir in the cheese. Stir in the eggs last, so they don't cook when they hit the rest of the ingredients (mixing in the cold cheese and cooled-down rice first cools the whole thing down). Taste the mixture and add more salt or pepper if you want.

Bake the whole kit and kaboodle at 375 for 30-40 minutes, or just until the edges turn brown and crispy and the top is firm.


Tada!! I ate two-thirds of the pan.

Gluten-free goodness.

I've felt both relieved and sad to realize that I'm going to be giving up wheat for at least several months before trying it again: relieved because I'm confident that doing so will help me continue to feel good, but sad obviously because it means not eating a lot of things I love eating. I know there are wheat-free versions of bread and cookies and muffins and such, but you can't buy them at restaurants, or order them at the Bojangles drive-thru, and they usually aren't what's on offer at social gatherings.

In addition to the practical aspect of just not eating something I'm used to eating, there's the awkwardness I feel when explaining to someone why I'm not eating it. I turned down some girl scouts selling cookies outside the Harris Teeter, and found myself explaining "Gosh, I wish I could, but I don't eat wheat." First of all, I don't know why I didn't just say "No thanks" and leave it at that. And second of all, as I walked away, I realized that I didn't want to say "I can't eat wheat" not only because it sounds so limiting and permanent, but because I'm afraid of the follow up question "Oh, why not?" that I don't have a good answer for.

I don't have celiac disease, which is the one diagnosis people might recognize. I don't have ANY disease according to the four doctors I've seen in the last year. I have no official diagnosis from anybody. And people without diagnoses sound crazy. I can't say "my doctor told me I shouldn't eat wheat" because my doctor took very little interest in my new diet, and I've had to figure it all out by myself. And I start to sound like some wacky alternative health fanatic when I try to explain that "I haven't been diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis, but I've had a lot of the symptoms, and one alternative theory for what causes arthritis has to do with food allergies and so I did this diet..." Nobody wants to listen through that explanation, and I feel obnoxious giving it.

And if what I've been reading is correct, I could very well eat wheat again in six months and be able to tolerate it again without symptoms. I hate garnering sympathy, and don't want people to think I'm either some hyperchondriac diva insisting on inconvenient food, or some sad case of chronic arthritis, facing a tragic future of disability and deformity. Which is maybe why I like writing about it on here - I can give a cursory explanation to any friend that asks, and then refer them to my blog if they're really interested. I suppose I don't like drawing attention to myself, and I don't like feeling as though something about me is defective.

I swung down the ethnic food aisle of Harris Teeter yesterday. I haven't bought much in the way of packaged food lately, with the exception of a few dairy products, and tea. But after reading a few labels, I found some exciting new foods to add to my list of foods-that-don't-make-me-feel-80-years-old. Rice noodles, and rice crackers, and my favorite....rice chex!!! It's even labelled "gluten-free"! I can finally get my cereal fix.

I've got sweet potato casserole in the oven right now, and the apartment smells like cinnamon. I restocked on fresh fruit, and picked up some locally grown kale I'm going to play with tomorrow. There might be more rice pudding in the offing for later, and I've been looking for some recipes for homemade honey-glazed peanuts that I plan on trying soon. I'm not about to let one missing ingredient stand between me and food happiness. Wheat, I hope we meet again on better terms, but until then, I won't be losing sleep over you.

Chocolate. (Day 42)

At small group last night, instead of chips and dip (which caused me problems last time) we had dark chocolate fondue with bananas and apples. Ha!! I can actually EAT bananas and apples! And the fondue was just made with dairy, which is fine, and dark chocolate, which I'd been meaning to test anyway. So I went for it, shamelessly globbing as much chocolate on each hunk of fruit as I possibly could. The bananas especially were heavenly

However, I wasn't convinced that I'd had enough fondue to really trigger any symptoms, should chocolate prove problematic, so I figured I'd better pick up some extra. Three minutes before the Harris Teeter closed, I ran in and grabbed the first chocolate I could find: a 60% cacao Ghirardelli baking bar. It wasn't even a real candy bar, and the cashier lady laughed when I ran up to the register, right as she was fixing to close down, with one lone hunk of chocolate, but I can't say I cared much.

Verdict? I seemed to feel okay this morning, after eating half of the thing in about five minutes upon getting back home.

I've got to make a grocery run tonight though - I've got several things I need to test out this week. Almonds are on the list, as are garlic, corn (re-test) and wine. I also need to start trying out other cereal grains, so I'm going to pick up some quinoa and some barley. AND some puffed rice, so I can get my cereal fix again finally. Lately, Harris Teeter has become a world of amazing possibilities - every time I go I get to pick out something I haven't eaten in 30, 35, 40 days. The simplest foods are suddenly the biggest deal. I'm testing garlic tomorrow. I've always loved garlic, but I'm planning on roasting a whole head of it and just eating it. I absolutely cannot wait.

See ya, wheat.

People keep asking me how my diet is going, and have I learned anything yet? I figured an update was due.

Today is the 40th day since I began my investigative eating. I have grown pleasantly accustomed to "no symptoms at all" being the default entry in my journal. I've got a list of about 30 things I can eat with no problems, and another list of several things I'm in the process of re-testing, because I either had a bad reaction the first time, or I ate the item in combination with other things and so couldn't really tell which food was the issue.

I keep the list of things I can eat on a post-it on my wall. Grocery shopping has become much easier. Harris Teeter Express: produce section, dairy case, peanuts from the snack aisle, and I'm out the door.




My ability to DO things hasn't been limited in weeks, which is great. I haven't had to put off a run because my knee hurts, or wash my hair with one hand because my shoulder hurts, or leave the dishes dirty for a couple days because my wrists are too sore to pick up my cast iron skillet. Normal has become the new normal. Which is what I wanted in the first place.

Bad news... I re-tested wheat on Sunday and had two giant bowls of shredded wheat before going to bed. After several straight days feeling 100% fine, I woke up the next morning with both wrists stiff and sore. So I won't be eating wheat for a while, which sucks, but I at least feel confident that I'm not giving up one of my favorite foods for no reason. The relationship between food and pain was pretty clear. So I bid a sad farewell to my cereal collection. It was like the post-breakup purge of things that remind you of your ex. It was hard to do, but I feel better with them out of my house.

I also re-tested beef last night. Same reaction. Later that evening and into the next morning, my hands and wrists were stiff and sore. By this afternoon, I felt fine again. It hurts throwing away the perfectly good leftover beef in the fridge, but it hurts more having pain shooting up the backs of your hands when you're trying to brush your hair. So...I can deal.

Apart from these two specific tests, I had one cheater night last week that confirmed the existence of a relationship between what I eat and whether my joints hurt. I recently have gotten involved in a small at church and there's always snack food. The first time I went to the group I just didn't eat anything, but this past Wednesday I decided I was tired of being rude and not eating their food. So I had potato chips, ranch dip, mixed nuts, red wine, wheat thins...I don't even remember what else. Some chicken salad spread, or something? Anyway, the next morning my wrists were both puffy and sore, a knee hurt, a shoulder hurt, and an elbow hurt. Tada!

So, what now?

I've been trying a new food every day or two, and recording how I feel every day. Today I tried bacon. I REALLLLYYY hope I feel fine tomorrow. Pork has been okay, so I'm hoping that the handful of unintelligible additives in my Oscar Mayer bacon don't trigger any problems.

According to the magical Dr. Mansfield and his book, and everything I've read on the internet, what I need to do now is cut out any foods that cause problems for a period of at least six months. During this time, allegedly, my body has the potential to "heal" itself, or to repair my "leaky gut" or "intestinal permeability" or in some other way get its shit together. After I've given it a break from whatever was causing problems, I should (again, theoretically) be able to reintroduce problem foods slowly and gradually, and hopefully then be able to tolerate them in moderation going forward.

I guess I'll see what happens. At this point, I'm not madly craving carbs the way I was for a while. As long as they're not paraded in front of me (someone brings brownies to a meeting, or there's leftover cake sitting around at school)...I don't really miss them very much. I've been kind of amazed at how your body can really learn to stop WANTING certain things - it really feels like kicking an addiction. I've stopped feeling like I need to have a pile of starch to feel full by the end of a meal. Today for lunch I had an orange, a banana, a bunch of grapes, a bunch of carrots, and some cheese. I felt perfectly satisfied by the end, whereas I used to feel like I needed a muffin or a granola bar or some bread to feel full. So it's reassuring to know that my body seems to be impressively capable of adapting.

So I guess we'll just keep seeing how things go. I'm incredibly thankful to feel solidly and consistently GOOD on a daily basis. I'd kind of gotten used to having one knuckle or another be stiff on any given morning, or having my shoulders feel sore every morning, or having my wrists twinge with pain if I moved them too far in one direction. I've started running regularly and I'm trying to actually get in some kind of semi-adequate shape for the first time in a while. I can finally rely on my body to be fully functional all the time, instead of thinking "Well, I can start thus-and-such exercise program but it's all going to get screwed up if my [insert critical body part] starts acting up."

I've got an appointment scheduled with my rheumatologist in March, but I'm going to cancel. I'm much happier eating food than I would be taking drugs. Until I have cause to do otherwise, I'll continue giving my body the benefit of the doubt, and trusting that it's much more capable of taking care of itself than I (or the medical establishment) give it credit for.

"Maybe I'll be a poemist"

A poem written after school by a student, who was supposedly staying after school to do homework. I accepted this as a satisfactory substitute.

Our 3rd block may seem boring, but thats OK
We still have fun In a Good type of way
When Mis Anderson laughs she gets real red
Some times even tears shed
I think my civic teachers get wasted during school
but At West Meck, who dosent do it when dey in the mood
My teachers are cool
But the students can be a fool
In now In some times our class is exicting
A few months our class was about fighting
Things we learn is endored with intrest
Im curious about new things every day before Entrace
I just want to say Yall make my day
By developing me into a informed, intrersted, and empowerd citizen of today.

(That last line is taken from a slogan we have posted in the classroom...kid knows how to win brownie points.)

Why sometimes teaching is hysterically funny

Collected from the last several weeks, here is an assortment of exchanges with my high school students.

Today, one of my students, who is black, had just spent twenty minutes sitting in a classroom while an ESL class of Vietnamese students gave presentations on famous civil rights leaders. He speaks very deliberately, and knows he is hysterically funny.

"So they're talking about Martin Luther King," he tells me. "Only I can't understand what they're saying, because they sound like 'Mah-tin Loo-teh King Joon-ya' and then one of them asks me if Martin Luther King ate a lot of fried chicken. And you're laughing Ms. Andersen, but they didn't ask you, they asked me, and I didn't laugh because that would have been rude. And they wouldn't have asked you, because you're white. But I know all about Martin Luther King. And fried chicken. Obviously."

And also today, we were reading an article that used the word "macro." So, we explained what the word "macro" means.

Me: "Macro" means "big."

My student: So what do "roni" mean?

He explained further: "I was thinking like, if 'macro' mean big, then maybe macaroni means like, 'big cheese noodle.'"

This is the same kid, who last week was suddenly awestruck by the fact that we live on a planet. "I'm tellin you, we're living on a PLANET. Like, we're living on top of a rock with water and dirt on it. Planet earth, man. And you think like, we're just a speck of dust in the whole picture, like I bet we're like a speck of dust in an alien's closet. One of these days someone's just gonna blow dry us out the way!"

Later in that conversation, he comes out with...

Student: So if you get all that money, you gonna be comin' in here and make it precipitate?

Cliff, my co-teacher: What?

Student: You know, makin' it rain?

They're so smart! I love my kids.

In addition to commenting on my eyes (which happens with some regularity, for some reason) my kids will also comment on how small I am ("Ms. Andersen, you look just like a little kid!"), or on how long my hair is (today, for instance, I was asked if my hair had grown, because it was "looking pretty long.") These are at least relatively reasonable things to notice, I guess. Last week though, one of my kids looks at me and makes the following observation: "Ms. Andersen, you look like you was outside this morning selling lemonade or something."

Moral of the story, little kids say super cute things that make you swoon with their adorableness. High schoolers just say the absolutely most ridiculous things you've ever heard - and I love it. Not to say my job isn't really hard sometimes. And not to say it isn't stressful, and there isn't a lot of pressure, and a lot isn't at stake for these kids. But sometimes all I can do is stand there laughing hysterically. Because I love my kids, and they are some of the damn funniest people I've ever met.